Tuesday, March 20, 2007

The Five Best Ways To Ruin A Relationship

If you have a relationship that you want to ruin try these five proven methods.
  1. Stop talking to them - this makes communication difficult...
  2. Do nothing - This will require more patience on your part but eventually the other person will get frustrated enough to give up on you.
  3. Insult them - you may think how much they cry after you insult them is a good guage of how much they love you but it will also cause irrevocable harm.
  4. Make them jealous - flirting with others may drive them back into your arms or it may just make them decide that you are a jerk and not worth the trouble.
  5. Get revenge - sure it feels good but it also makes them never want to speak to you again.

3 comments:

Plainbellied said...

Idea #1 definitely works. There's a family in my ward that just doesn't come to the door sometimes. They don't pretend they aren't home; you can hear them all and see the lights and everything. One time, they were even holding a yard sale and had their cash box outside, but they still didn't answer the door when my husband knocked. I don't care that I was in the hospital with this woman when we both had our daughters the same day.

turtar said...

The same family takes walks right past our house and never stops to say hello. We're OK with that, though.

rbsp said...

Man, your neighbors are so mean... I say if they are going to be that way, you be that way too. You will be accomplishing both #1 and #5 at the same time.

My first experience with #1 was in the third grade when I got mad at Tricia H. for not playing dodgeball at recess after she promised she would. I froze her out for a good three months before I gave in and started talking to her again.