I Need To Get Out Of My Calling

So when I came down to Arizona I hoped it would mean they would release me from my calling which is doing the program for sacrament meeting every month. Which in theory is an easy calling that you can get done early in the week and then not worry about it, but inevitably I would wind up doing it at 2 a.m. Sunday morning and then go to church at 8:30. It was pretty brutal. So I was hoping to get out of said calling. I mean how could they go a month without sacrament meeting programs, they would have to release me... No such luck. I have been informed the bishopric is doing it in the interim and my calling will be waiting for me when I get back.

This is bad news because actually as it turns out I'm not doing an internship in Arizona. It was all part of an elaborate lie to get out of my calling. Right now as a matter of fact I am held up in a motel in South Provo. The hardest thing to fake so far has been that huge guitar. It took me months to build that thing.